It's been a year

I can't believe I haven't blogged in a year. I kept meaning to get back here. It's not that nothing has been going on, I think it's too much has and finding the time to write it all out, just hasn't existed. After weeks of waiting for my TSH levels to be high enough for my one year scan, Praise God they are. I was beginning to feel like I was in the movie GroundHog Day. I was having the same week over and over and over again for an entire month. I am currently undergoing my small dose of Radioactive Iodine Treatment for my scan which is tomorrow. I have been waiting patiently for this day for 379 days. Tomorrow will finally be the day that I find out if my cancer is gone, has returned, or has spread somewhere else. I get a WBS and should find out right after the scan what the story is. I can't explain the emotions involved in something like this. When I was told last year that I had cancer. My whole life changed. Some ways good, some bad. I definately started taking the time to stop and smell the roses and enjoy each day with my children but I also found my self less patient than I had ever been. I thank God that my friends and family have seen the changes, and called me on them. Let me explain...... Before cancer, I was bubbly, happy, carefree and fun. I loved life, couldn't wait to wake up in the morning, always wanted to find an adventure for my days off. Loved going to work, loved my assignment, excelled at work and constantly overachieved. For personal satisfaction. Not for recognition. I had fun at work, laughed out loud every single day. Tried not to pee in my pants many times, and felt like I didn't have a care in the world. Then my life changed. My boss retired, I got a new one, he replaced our whole staff, I didn't know how my new assignment would fit into my family life, I had lots of pressure to make it work and the choice really wasn't mine. I had to ask for help. For those of you that know me personally, this is one thing I am not good at. I have always been the self proclaimed "work horse" I could do anything, even after my C Sections, I didn't ask for help, I work through colds, sickness, bad weather, death in the family, etc. Asking for help, is not what I do. All in all, everything worked out. My best friend MO asked for help for me. She got it, I got the assignment I needed, and everything worked out according to plan. I had an 8 week old at home, had just returned to work and my father in law was dying of lung cancer. Thank God it all worked out. I thank God for her every single night in my prayers and pray for her every single time I get a spare moment. She is the true definition of friend. She is loyal and kind. She is caring and trusting, she is one of the only people that know the real me. The good, bad and the ugly if you will. She was sent by God to be my best friend in this life. I couldn't ask for a better one if I custom created her myself. So into the Cancer Journey I went.......