The Waiting is the Hardest Part

The waiting is the hardest part
Every day you see one more card
You take it on faith, you take it to the heart
The waiting is the hardest part
Dont let it kill you baby, dont let it get to you


This is my theme song of the day. LOL. Tomorrow starts the week of waiting.
The schedule is Monday- Thyrogen shot
Tuesday - Thyrogen shot
Wednesday - Low dose of Radioactive Iodine
Thursday - Nothing
Friday - Scan I am sure I won't have the results until Monday.
I also have to squeeze in my bloodwork somewhere during the week since I asked the DR a week and a half ago to send the order to my house so I can go to the local lab instead of driving all the way to the hospital and paying for parking. When did it arrive? Yesterday. At 2pm. What time does the local lab close? 1pm. ROFL. Perfect timing. Now that I will be spending 4 out of 5 days at the hospital, I might as well get it done there. Why make an additional trip to the lab now when the hospital has a lab. LOL

I got mad at my mom today. After Wednesday I should keep my distance from everyone especially the kids. I was trying to figure out how this will be best to do and I was talking about where I will decide to keep myself. She suggested the basement. Is this crazy or what? I am the one with CANCER. I am the one who is stressed out beyond belief. I am the one who will be feeling like total DOGSHIT. I am the one who should be treated nice. Guess today is where being lonely starts. No one can come near me, no one can comfort me, no one can really understand unless they have been there. Yes folks it's true. At the lowest point in your life, you aren't allowed to touch anyone. No one can hug you or hold your hand. When you cry, your tears are Radioactive. Isn't that sad. It makes me really very sad and lonely. I am thinking about possibly going to stay at a hotel or something so that no one is freaked out about it. I didn't have to do that 2 years ago but I guess with McKenna being older, it might be harder to keep her away from me. I just don't know what to do. Maybe I will just go stay at my mom's house. It just really sucks that the when you need the people around you the most, you can't be around them.

So sing it with me now everyone...........................
The waiting is the hardest part....................every day you get one more card......... :)